Wednesday, October 13, 2004

24 questions

That's right! The Very Special Coming Out Week Post is a big gay meme!

1. At what age did you realize you were gay? 13. I was crushing madly on a friend of mine, Annie. I was actually in the hallway of my Catholic grade school when it dawned on me that what I felt for her, I was supposed to be feeling for boys. I didn't have any words to describe or understand my situation, so I didn't think, "Oh god, I'm gay!" but "Uh oh. Something's wrong with me. This is very very bad."
2. What did you do when you first came to this realization? The usual. Denial, Repression, Self-loathing, Bargaining with God. I figured if I ignored it long enough it would just go away, and of course it didn't. So I became an overachieving superkid, the perfect student, perfect daughter, perfect Catholic, hoping that if I was perfect enough God would be willing to overlook my little secret.
3. Who was the first person you told? A university counselor.
4. How did they react? Well, like a counselor, which was good. Very supportive and reassuring.
5. Did you go through a period of time thinking that you were bisexual? Yep, for about two months or so. Long enough to come out as such to a few people before I realized "Wait, this isn't me. It doesn't fit."
6. Did you ever date/get intimate with someone of the opposite sex? I had three comically disastrous dates with two very nice boys. I remember being on the second date and willing myself to work up some enthusiasm for him.
7. Does your mother know? Yep. Mom actually confronted me; and now all my friends and my immediate family know. And except for Shithead who thinks I'm "immoral" and doesn't want his children "exposed to that kind of thing", the reactions have mostly been positive. Not looking forward to telling my big fat Catholic extended family though, but there's no way I can avoid it.
8. Now that you define yourself as gay, would you date someone who is bisexual? Sure.
9. Would you ever date a drag king?
Drag kings are sexy!
10. Would you date a transexual? Maybe; depends how strongly I felt about them.
11. Would you date someone who was HIV positive? See above.
12. Who’s your favorite queer female musician/band? Hm. I'd have to go with Tegan and Sara.
13. If there was a pill that could make you straight, would you take it? Why or why not? No. I like girls, and I like liking them. I'm happy and comfortable with myself, which is a novel experience. I would however like to take a vacation now and then from being a point of controversy. Identity politics suck.
14. Hairy legs? Vegetarian? Yes, and Sorta. The food here is kinda scary so I figure I'm better off if I stay away from the mystery meat. Plus I like organic food.
15. Crunchy dyke or lipstick lesbian? I guess I'm turning out pretty crunchy. I'll be taking up acoustic guitar before you know it.
16. Butch or femme? Andro/genderqueer? Well I have accidently passed for a boy more than once, but I'm comfortable with androgyny. So I'm butch as I wanna be and femme when I feel like it.
17. Who’s your favorite queer female author? Oh gosh, I guess I'd have to say Sarah Waters, if only because Tipping the Velvet has had such a big place in my life. But then I adore Emma Donoghue, and Rubyfruit Jungle, and Virginia Woolf, and Adrienne Rich...
18. Ever been to the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival? Alas, no. Someday.
19. Do you use the words "fag" and "dyke" but then get upset when someone straight uses them? Yes. Well I don't actually use "fag" hardly at all, but I like "dyke." Reclaiming words is very important, blah blah, so if you're not a fag or a dyke, you don't get to use them.
20. Are you sure it isn't just a phase, like Anne Heche? Yes. For christ's sake, has nobody heard of BISEXUALITY???
21. If someone saw you walking down the street, would they know right off the bat that you are gay? Maybe. L. said she guessed I was gay when she saw me the first day of class last semester, so there you go. I'm certainly setting off the gaydar today, what with my purple flannel shirt (seriously) and my big-ass black doc martens, I pretty much scream "dyke."
22. Have you ever been to a rave? No. There really is no place to rave here, and I wouldn't go anyway if there was. Not my thing.
23. The BEST part about being gay? Actually liking myself. Liking my life. Not being depressed.
24. The WORST part? Dealing with family members. It's no fun going from "daughter" to "one of Them."

Via FrogBlog. Modified by me, because IMHO whoever wrote it orignally was a straight person talking to gay guys (middle-aged gay guys at that. "Have you ever seen Cher in concert?" WTF?). I wanted to post something about Coming Out Day, because as of last Monday I've officially been out a year, but I didn't want to be all melodramatic and tragic, but I wanted to say something important, etc. Indecisive me. So I figured a meme was a good way to go, seeing as this is a blog and all. So. There you are. Now don't be a shithead and go vote Democrat.


At 8:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

If I were there, I'd make you a dollar...
I realize that doesnt make much sense, so i'll explain. You know how alcoholics get a coin for there first sober day, week, month, year, etc. Well I have a good friend here in Chicago who just quit smoking. Since I couldn't give her a "smoke-free" coin I made her a dollar out of a napkin. Well, if i were there, I'd make you an "out of the closet" for a year dollar (also out of a napkin)!

At 9:37 AM, Blogger Andygrrl said...

Aw! What a cool idea! I guess I'll have to make do with an imaginary out-of-the-closet-paper-napkin-dollar. ;-)


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